Preparing For The Beast

I ought to be thankful that I was never a slave to the latest fashions. But I’ll have to settle to being a slave to full moons. Rummaging through these old clothes is actually kind of relaxing. It’s a shame that I have to buy two sets of clothes every 28 days. There are the clothes for the actual transformation: the clothes that get torn to shreds when the metamorphosis happens. Then there are the clothes that will be waiting for me when it’s all over. Hell, it’s better than the first few times when I was wandering around the woods naked and cold in the morning. Getting back to the apartment was the trickiest part. At least now, everyone thinks I’m just a horrible dresser as opposed to some sort of pervert.

Sometimes I wish I could afford nicer clothes. But with all the sides of beef that I’ve purchased, I’m lucky to have enough money to buy regular human food. It’s a small sacrifice; but I’d rather have this monster inside me devouring an entire side of beef than some unfortunate hiker. Then, there’s trying to hide the cow carcasses. I used to have the food right in front of me when I transformed. But then I’d gulp down the entire thing in less than a minute; that made for an unpleasant morning. Hiding the food buys me some time and forces me to run around in circles in the wilderness. God forbid, that I wander hungry into the city. I can’t chain myself somewhere; breaking free, starving for raw flesh is too much of a risk.

It took me a while to figure all this out. I nearly killed a ranger in the forest that first night. Fortunately, he had the wherewithal to shoot me with that 12-gauge. I didn’t get hurt, but at least the shots scared me off. I hope to God that he didn’t get hurt. I hope I didn’t touch him. I wouldn’t wish this curse on my worst enemies.

Just a few years ago, I didn’t have to worry about the meat, about the clothes, about hurting anyone else. I had a girlfriend and a normal life. We just wanted to go for a romantic moonlit stroll to the lake. Unfortunately it was a full moon. The air was cold and still. The ripples on the lake were gentle, magnifying the light from the moon. It was going to be where I proposed to her. At least that was the thought that was running through my head before we heard the rustling of the trees.

Heavy footsteps fell, but we couldn’t tell from where. The crunch of leaves and twigs surrounded us. It wasn’t until we heard the damned thing breathing that we both got scared. The hair on the backs of our necks stood in attention. My legs were like jelly. But all I could think about was protecting her. The bushes behind us moved violently. As soon as our heads turned, the air around the lake froze. I turned to see that the monster was already leaping towards us. I used my body to shield her from the fangs, but it was too large and swept its paw at me throwing into the frigid water. When I woke up I saw her lifeless body hanging from his enormous jaw as he walked away. The police never found a body, and I wasn’t able to walk for a month.

Every time I change into that beast it’s all at once frightening, painful, and sometimes enjoyable. As much as I hat to admit it, there’s something so liberating about becoming the monster. The bones in my body crunch and rearrange. My face goes numb as my face grows into a grotesque snout. The teeth elongate and sometimes pierce through my mouth during the transformation. My spine becomes a column of fire as I grow five times my size. I can feel every sinew of every muscle tear and regenerate. Every nerve synapse fires all at once like firecrackers under my skin. The hair slides slowly through my pores like hundreds of jagged razors slicing me open from the inside. A hideous howl escapes my lungs and lunges into the air in a vapor cloud. Everything that happens after that is lost to the night. I have no memory of anything else once the transformation is complete. I just pray to God, that I hadn’t killed anyone that night.

The alarm on my watch just went off. That’s my cue to head on out to the site. It’ll only be two hours until the full moon rises over the horizon. I’m lucky the moon comes out at night this time around. I’ve got my extra clothes for the next morning. I’ve got a map of the general area, and I’ve marked the places where I’ve hidden the carcasses for feeding on. I’m stuck with this life, with this curse until someone comes up with some sort of cure. If I’m lucky enough, maybe a raving lunatic with a gun loaded with silver bullets will pass me by.